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How to rest without guilt

Published on Aug 25, 2021

Woman who has learnt to rest without guilt reading in a hammock on a beach in the sun 
I told my neighbour I was back from a 4-week holiday, and she looked at me with surprise and asked ‘how is that for your clients’? I checked in with my inner judge, but it turned out she had nothing to say today. Silence. It was as if I wanted to hear that harsh Swedish voice who usually says, ‘Isn’t that selfish’? But it was like she had finally left me in peace, like that kid who tries to bully someone who doesn’t care.

BREAKTHROUGH 1: It seems that after 8 years of taking a month-long holiday every summer, I’m finally not feeling guilty about it.

I bicycled with my bestie to a Pilates class on the beach in southern Sweden this summer. When one of the other participants heard that I was staying in Yngsjö, a couple of kilometres away, she asked if I had biked the whole way. I checked in with my inner judge, but it turned out she had nothing to say. Silence. After an uncomfortable pause, I realized I could simply answer her: ‘No, I’m too lazy to bike such a long way in the morning, I drove to my friend’s house and then took the bike the last bit.’

BREAKTHROUGH 2: The word ‘lazy’ has been equal to ‘stupid’ and ‘worthless’ my whole life. This was the first time EVER I used the word without shame. I wasn’t proud, but I wasn’t feeling stupid or worthless. I felt free.

How do you feel when you hear the word ‘lazy’?

During my years as superwoman, I froze every time I heard this word. Grrrr. Anything but lazy! I’m strong and not the type who needs a lot of sleep and rest!

When was the last time you rested without feeling guilty?

I still have a hard time giving myself permission to rest sometimes, but I’ve set up my life so that I don’t end up too stressed.

Taking a 4-week summer holiday helps.

Saying NO to things—like taking the bike instead of the car just to prove that I’m not lazy, helps.

Saying NO to the ‘harder, better, faster, stronger culture’ helps.

Saying YES to my well-being helps.

What about you?

I’d love to hear in the comments how this resonated with you.

If you’re curious to find ways to say YES to your well-being and NO to other people’s expectations, coaching is an excellent tool. I have coached hundreds of women and men to prioritize their well-being and get clarity on what’s stopping them from living in more alignment with what they truly want.

If you, or someone you know would benefit from coaching, please book a call with me here:



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Hello, I’m Katarina Stoltz, a life coach and psychotherapist helping international professionals prioritise their well-being so they can achieve fulfillment without burning out.

Welcome to the 'Time To Thrive' blog, where I share real-life stories and offer valuable and practical tips for how to prevent burnout, expand your self awareness and start living your vision.

I don’t offer ‘quick fix’ solutions, but my tips are straightforward and easy to follow. You’re in the right place if you’re looking for some thought-provoking articles and honest life stories.

I’m happy you’re here!


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